Hi All! I am working on a really neat project right now- I am collecting pictures of couples laboring together and focusing on how important it is to have hubby's support during labor. If you have a favorite picture that you would love to share, email me at amecimore@gmail.com! In the meantime, enjoy some of the lessons I learned!
We want to have more children in the future. After doing this once, I have a pretty good idea of what I will and won't do the next time. Here is my little list!
1. I will not buy all the baby junk. We had 3 bathtubs, 2 bouncers, a swing, a bumbo...all of which she rarely used. We ended up showering with her because she preferred it and carrying her in our Ergo or Moby wrap alot. We were also drowning in pink by the time she came. And most of her outfits she only wore once or twice- although she stayed in the same size for a long time, she had so many outfits!
2. I will breastfeed on demand. I remember breastfeeding in the beginning being so painful and uncomfortable. She would cry and my husband would say "maybe she's hungry?". I would groan and say "she can't be- it hasn't been 3 hours yet". I'm not sure where I got that number from. It was also partly an excuse to give me a rest from the pain. I think that this caused a slight aversion for her and also depleted my milk supply quickly. Both of which I did not discover until it was too late- and by that time I really enjoyed nursing and wanted to continue. I will do my best to feed the baby when baby is hungry!
3. I will relax. The baby could absolutely sense my anxiety and therefore she would not sleep on me and fussed often when she was in my arms. Then I would pass her to her daddy and she would calm down and knock out. He was calm, I was uptight. It's a hard thing to NOT do as a new mother, but as soon as I calmed down and stopped my frantic emotions and anxiety, she calmed down too. It was amazing. To this day, if I overreact, she does too. If I stay calm, she stays calm or at least calms quickly! They are so in tune with their mothers!
4. I will buy a super comfy La-Z-Boy recliner for the nursery! I have a glider- actually 2 gliders- and I really like them. They are comfortable and fit me well, but are NOT great for the late night sick babies who have to be held upright. They are not good for cranky babies who need to sleep on you all night. I have already told my husband that we will be investing in a big comfy chair that I can sleep in. This will make those nights a little easier and give me a few more precious moments of sleep!
5. I will (probably) invest in a video monitor. This one is still up in the air. We are cheap, so we just have your typical sound monitors. A friend bought us nice ones that you could play music on or speak through, but they broke early on. I just want a video monitor to avoid waking that precious sleeping babe and to see what they're doing in there once they get old enough to explore and talk to themselves. We'll see.
6. I will (probably) co-sleep. We never did with Piper because neither of us could sleep since we were so uptight with her in bed! And she also seemed to not enjoy it- as soon as we moved her into her room, she slept a longer stretch than she ever had before! I don't want to do it forever, just long enough to create a good breastfeeding bond. It also saves me from getting up and down in the night, and maybe we'll sleep better (it's all about the sleep with newborns).
7. I will invest in a postpartum belly band. These are meant to help pull your hips back together and compress your body back down after childbirth. It is also proven to help with weight loss and getting back to your normal size and activities, and can help speed up the bleeding process afterwards. I had one on hand, I just was lazy and didn't realize how much it would have helped! Many moms that I know wore it at home for at least 6 weeks- it's a little bulky to wear out. I will be doing this next time! (Also called belly binding).
8. I will buy all brown and yellow onesies. This is kind of a joke, but kind of not. I don't know why anyone makes white onesies. With all the poop, spit up, and other body fluids during those first months, it's better to just leave them in a neutral color, or naked. I couldn't even count how many pink and white onesies I scrubbed stains out of (or had to throw away).
9. I will check for a tongue tie/ lip tie IMMEDIATELY. Before we leave the hospital or birth center, this is happening. Since it is more likely with each child born, there's a good chance our next one(s) will have it also. If so, I want to get it snipped and taken care of ASAP so that I can really focus on breastfeeding and any other issues!
10. I will not listen to everyone else. By now, I consider myself a fairly experienced mom. Granted, I will listen to mothers of multiple children who will hopefully give me encouragement and advice for how to manage more than one! But I will be confident in my ability as a woman and a mother to raise my children and decide what is best for our family.
Maybe some of these things will change, maybe they won't! What are some of the things that you would do differently?
I have thought about all of these things! things will be so different next time around!
ReplyDeleteI 100% agree with everything you mentioned... I do recommend a video monitor...I had one, he slept in the same room as us for over a year in his own crib. I just had to open my eyes and see he was okay. And I agree on the big comfy recliner. Oh man do I agree...even propped up on the bed ached. I did a belly bind and it helped a lot. I dont know about the weight liss part, but most definitely the hip reshaping. They sell colorful print onesies..lifesaver. I really threw away about 10+ onesies bc of staining...oooh, what abiut dying them...as an upcycle. Hmm food for thought. Great article. I wish my husband helped me birth, it would have been perfect. He was deployed for a while and met our son at 6 months old. Hopefully the next one :)
ReplyDeleteI so agree with #1,3,4,7,9, & 10! I believe to my core I was way too stressed and therefore baby was super stressed and my body struggled to produce more milk because of the strain. I also did not nurse in demand and 3 was my magic number too! Haha! If she cried before, I'd cry too. Next time, I WILL relax and just enjoy my newborn. I would also add, having a professional labor photographer capture the birth and to take newborn pictures! I still grieve over not taking newborn pictures for Hosanna! I was so stressed and in SO much pain. To invite someone over would mean I'd have to wear a shirt which was NOT gonna happen. Man, do I regret that!
ReplyDeleteGreat list! !:) love kristen
ReplyDeleteI breast feed on demand for Carsynn! When she was first born I tried to feed her every two hours because that's what they told me to do at the hospital, but she wasn't always hungry and then wouldn't eat enough, and then would be hungry before it had been another two hours... basically I was trying to feed her more than she needed. Once I stopped listening to what I was told was best for my baby, we were both much happier! I nurse whenever she seems hungry, and I let her eat until she is full. Sometimes she goes 2 hours between feedings, sometimes she will go 5.. it really depends on the day haha.
ReplyDeleteAnd having a video moniter is awesome! Creepy sometimes cause I am almost positive our girl KNOWS we can see her and will stare at the cameraat the front of her crib while she sucks her fingers. But its so helpful to be able to just check the moniter to see how she is doing. I love it even more for when she is taking naps! That way if I run to the store and her dad is working on his truck outside he can still easily keep an eye on her :)